I know you’re upset about how life has thrown you curveballs lately and it just seems like nothing is going your way. I know how frustrating it can be when you work hard every week and get passed up for that promotion. I remember the feeling of busting my butt in the gym and still falling short of hitting certain marks I assumed I’d be well past by now. And I know very well the struggle of being in a relationship that feels like one of you is sprinting ahead and the other is just holding still.
I’ve been there too, and yes, it can suck. We have zero control over our boss or our significant other. We are frustrated that we can’t better influence the decisions they made this week. And we definitely can’t control the rainy weather that just rained out our weekend plans.
But there’s always three things in life that we control:
- Our focus
- Our attitude
- Our actions
Every day we get to choose what we focus on – things within our control and things outside of our control. We grow stressed, anxious, and many times, frustrated when we concentrate on things outside of our control because no matter how hard we try, we can’t change them.
The strength of a Competitor lies in her ability to focus on the things within her control: what she focuses on, what attitude she chooses, and what actions she takes.
We can focus on what frustrated us about our current role at work or we can choose to focus on what we can work on this week to improve our skillset as an employee or our potential as a prospect.
We can focus on what we don’t get to fully do in our current role or we can choose to focus on what we do well and where can we improve.
We can focus on how to be the best teammate and leader we can from the cubicle, and not just from the corner office.
Our strength lies in the fact that we get to choose what we focus on.
We may be upset about our lack of a pay raise but it’s still on us to choose our attitude during that moment.
We can be upset and still choose to grit our teeth and smile through it.
We can be angry and still choose to look for the positives in the situation. And we can even be jealous of our coworkers yet still choose to cheer hard for them knowing that as a team, we win together.
Most people you meet in life will use the excuse that something outside of their control is controlling their attitude.
- It’s someone else’s fault I’m being mean to you.
- It’s the weather that’s causing me to not do my job.
- It’s your fault I’m this way.
For these people, it’s always someone else’s fault for the attitude they’ve chosen in the moment. In reality, they’ve chosen that attitude in that moment, no one’s made them have it. Yes, people do things that can irritate us or impact us – however, it’s still 100% on us what attitude we choose in the moment.
This may sound surprising but it’s not the disappointing situation that matters most – it’s how a Competitor responds to it.
It’s your actions in response to not getting the outcome you desire. And those are 100% up to you.
It’s up to you to choose to go talk to your boss about the past over promotion and what you can do this month at work to increase your opportunities for one.
It’s up to you to choose to do the extra work after work to improve skills you’re currently behind on – or will need at your next stop.
And it’s up to you not quit on your company – to keep competing hard and being a great teammate in the middle of getting to where you ultimately want to be.
Whether you know it or not, other people are always watching you. Your coworkers will see your actions – how you respond to this situation – and it will either inspire their confidence in you as a teammate or create concern. How do you want them to feel about you?
Remember, the strength of a Competitor lies in her ability to focus on the things within her control.
So what if this week we don’t let the things outside of our control derail us from focusing on the things that are?
I thought you might agree, because after all, you’re a Competitor.